{"id":29,"date":"2016-10-05T08:01:45","date_gmt":"2016-10-05T08:01:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/kenukan.com\/blog\/?p=29"},"modified":"2016-10-06T05:17:20","modified_gmt":"2016-10-06T05:17:20","slug":"what-is-self-esteem-worth-today","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/kenukan.com\/blog\/2016\/10\/05\/what-is-self-esteem-worth-today\/","title":{"rendered":"What Is Self-Esteem Worth Today?"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Bob Boggs<\/em><\/p>\n

Unfortunately, society as a whole has made excuses for everything that falls short of \u201cnorm\u201d or doesn\u2019t run the course outlined by the \u201ctextbooks.\u201d\u00a0 We have become a society of excuses for all failures.\u00a0 Why is it that we can\u2019t accept the fact we just fall short or maybe can not muster the physical or mental stress?<\/p>\n

I remember a student of mine years ago, a yellow belt, who went to another academy and received his Black Belt in less than a year and a half.\u00a0 Upon keeping his dues current at my dojo, so as not to loose his membership, he came by one evening to make his payment while a green and white belt were present.\u00a0 I asked him the question, \u201cIs it a fact, that every student in your Taekwondo Academy can, and will receive a Black Belt if they keep up their attendance?\u201d\u00a0 Upon hesitation, and finally convinced that I wasn\u2019t setting him up for a physical altercation and embarrassment in front of the other students, he said,\u00a0 \u201cYes.\u00a0 But Mr. Boggs, you don\u2019t understand what Martial Arts is all about.\u201d\u00a0 \u201cPray tell, what is it that I\u2019ve missed over all these years?\u00a0 Please enlighten me,\u201d I responded.\u00a0 My students at this time had backed up not knowing how their instructor of 30 years plus would react to this over-night sensation and philosopher.<\/p>\n

I was then told that if a student doesn\u2019t receive his \/ or her Black Belt that the instructor has fallen short of his responsibility, the primary reason of teaching Martial Arts, building one\u2019s self-esteem.\u00a0 Of course, I thanked my former student for his insight and opening my eyes.\u00a0 I told him the next time I was in an airplane, that it wasn\u2019t important whether the pilot could fly the plane or pass the necessary tests.\u00a0 Let\u2019s not make him feel bad or tear down his self-esteem!<\/p>\n

Why is it that self-esteem has to be sugar coating?\u00a0 My Dad taught me, maybe a strength and guidance lacking today, that if I was a ditch digger, be the best I could be.\u00a0 I tell my martial arts students that there is no shame in falling short of one\u2019s goals, only shame in not trying.<\/p>\n

Self-esteem is a by-product of honor, courage, trust, spirit, and integrity \u2013 all character building blocks.\u00a0\u00a0We have to get away from the \u201cfeel good\u201d philosophy to build self-esteem and get back to accepting our own responsibility, good or bad.<\/i><\/b>\u00a0 If you are not teaching self-defense based solely on the student\u2019s ability, but by time, money, or on friendship, then you are teaching fairy tales and producing wannabes.<\/p>\n

In closing, I\u2019d like to reprint a message written by Mr. Paul Harvey:<\/p>\n

We tried so hard to make things better for our kids that we made them worse.\u00a0 For my grandchildren, I\u2019d like better.\u00a0 I\u2019d really like them to know about hand-me-down clothes and homemade ice cream and leftover meat sandwiches.\u00a0 I really would.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>My cherished grandson, I hope you learn humility by being humiliated, and that you learn honesty by being cheated.\u00a0 I hope you learn to make your bed and mow the lawn and wash the car.\u00a0 And I really hope nobody gives you a brand new car when you are sixteen.\u00a0 I hope you have a job by then.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>It will be good if at least one time you can see a baby calf born and your old dog put to sleep.\u00a0 I hope you get a black eye fighting for something you believe in.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>I hope you have to share a bedroom with your younger brother.\u00a0 And it\u2019s all right if you have to draw a line down the middle of the room, but when he wants to crawl under the covers with you because he\u2019s scared, I hope you let him in.\u00a0 When you want to see a Disney movie and your little brother wants to tag along, I hope you\u2019ll let him.\u00a0 I hope you have to walk uphill to school with your friends and that you live in a town where you can do it safely.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>On rainy days when you have to catch a ride, I hope your driver doesn\u2019t have to drop you two blocks away so you won\u2019t be seen riding with someone as uncool as your mom.\u00a0 If you want a slingshot, I hope your dad teaches you how to make one instead of buying one.\u00a0 I hope you learn to dig in the dirt and read books.\u00a0 When you learn to use those newfangled computers, I hope you also learn to add and subtract in your head.\u00a0 I hope you get razzed by your friends when you have your first crush on a girl, and when you talk back to your mother that you learn what Ivory soap tastes like.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>May you skin your knee climbing a mountain, burn your hand on a stove and stick your tongue on a frozen flagpole.\u00a0 I hope you get sick when someone blows cigar smoke in your face.\u00a0 I don\u2019t care if you try beer once, but I hope you don\u2019t like it.\u00a0 And if a friend offers you dope or a joint, I hope you realize he is not your friend.\u00a0 I sure hope you make time to sit on a porch with your grandpa and go fishing with your uncle. \u00a0May you feel sorrow at a funeral and the joy of holidays.\u00a0 I hope your mother punishes you when you throw a baseball through a neighbor\u2019s window and that she hugs you and kisses you at Christmas time when you give her a plaster of Paris mold of your hand.<\/i><\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/i>These things I wish for you \u2013 tough times and disappointment, hard work and happiness.<\/i><\/p>\n\n